Tag Archives: boat

fishing rod and reel joke husband goes fishing in the rain and cheating wife

I went to the river as usual

Leave a reply

My favorite hobby is fishing. I spend all my weekends near the river or lake chasing the elusive game fish, paying no attention to weather.

One Sunday early in the morning, I went to the river as usual. But it was freezing cold and the rain was coming down in sheets, so I decided to go back home. My clothes were soaked from the rain so I undressed in the garage, went to my bedroom and slipped into bed beside my still sleeping wife.

“Wow this is terrible weather today, honey.” I said.

“Yeah. And my idiot husband went fishing!”

A joke about waxin’ your boat

Leave a reply

So the Joke goes:

Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a great big smile on his face. Mike says, “Pat, what are you so happy for?””Well Mike, I gotta tell ya… Yesterday I was out waxin’ my boat, just waxin’ my boat, and a redhead came up to me.. tits out to here, Mike. Tits out to here! She says, ‘Can I have a ride in your boat?’ I said ‘Sure you can have a ride in my boat.’ So I took her way out, Mike. I turned off the key and I said ‘It’s either screw or swim!’ She couldn’t swim, Mike. She couldn’t swim!”
The next day Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a even bigger smile on his face. Mike says, “What are you happy about today Pat?” “Well Mike… I gotta tell ya… Yesterday I was out waxin’ my boat, just waxin’ my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blonde came up to me… tits out to here, Mike, and she said ‘Can I have a ride in your boat?’ I told her ‘Sure you can have a ride in my boat.’ So I took her way out, Mike. Way out much further than the last one. I turned off the key and I said, ‘It’s either screw or swim!’ She couldn’t swim, Mike! She couldn’t swim!”
A couple days pass and Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat down there cryin’ over a beer. Mike says, “Pat, what are you so sad for?” “Well Mike, I gotta tell ya… Yesterday I was out waxin’ my boat, just waxin’ my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me… tits WAY out to here, Mike. Tits WAY out to here. She says, ‘Can I have a ride in your boat?’ So I said, ‘Sure you can have a ride in my boat.’ So I took her way out,Mike, way WAY out… much further than the last two. I turned off the key, and looked at her tits and said ‘It’s either screw or swim!’
She pulled down her pants and….. She had a pecker, Mike! She had this great BIG pecker! …and I can’t swim Mike! I can’t swim!”